The Last Paper Assignment: Paper #4: Old Wine in New Bottles!

NOTE: The questions for Monday are in the post BELOW this one...

INTRO: Students often complain, “why are they speaking in Old English?!” when reading anything from Shakespeare to Jane Austen, even though the language is easily accessible with a little practice. But then when you ask them their favorite movies, it’s often an adaptation of something very old, which only looks/sounds like new. Even though these films are now pretty old, so many people adore Clueless, Ten Things I Hate About You, She’s the Man, and Cruel Intentions, each one of which is based on a classic work of literature. The twist? It only sounds new through the language and the context—a modern high school, spoken by modern gossip-mongering teens. So is the play the thing? Or does the language really matter?

PROMPT: Sort of following on the heels of our dramatization of The Sonnets, I want you to RE-WRITE A SHORT PASSAGE from either The School for Scandal OR Emma in modern language and in a modern setting. Imagine that this is part of a new adaptation of either work that is set, Clueless-style, somewhere in the modern world. Figure out where it would work, in what setting/context, and between what characters. You can keep the characters exactly the same (Emma, Knightley, etc., just as Clueless did) or you can change their names or backgrounds as long as you don’t fundamentally change who they are. But all you really have to do is re-write a passage (length is entirely up to you) in modern language/style without deviating from the general sense of the passage in question. I want to read some of these in class so we can hear the translations live, and enjoy what changes and what doesn’t change with the switch of language and time/place.

FOR EXAMPLE: In Chapter 31 of Emma, Emma is trying to talk Harriet out of love with Mr. Elton. She finally finds a wonderful way to gaslight her, which I might re-write as the following: “Harriet, if we’re being honest, you’re really making me feel like proper shit here. I mean, I’ve done so much for you, and I’ve already taken the blame for this whole Mr. Elton-fiasco, but here you’re still whining about him and why it didn’t work out. So what you’re really saying is, “Emma, you’re a terrible matchmaker, or else you don’t think I deserved him to begin with.” Which is really triggering me because like, I know it’s my fault, okay? I get it. You don’t have to keep reminding me. My therapist—Dr. Weston, she’s totally the best—is already telling me about working on my positive self-image, and I was about to scale back to three sessions a week, but then whenever you start crying, it’s like one step forward, two steps back, you know? So chill, please. I’m only thinking about you, after all. You get that, right?”

See how fun it is? So take a passage that really delights you, either a long dialogue-bath from Miss Bates, or a witty change between Sir Peter and Lady Teazle, and let us hear how modern words/phrases can clothe this timeless situation. Help us see how modern it is behind the 18/19^th century decorum. Because really, nothing ever changes, and literature in particular reminds of this fact.

DUE IN-CLASS Friday, May 9^th! It’s a birthday present to me! 😊